Enigmatic E

Though I admit I'm incredibly curious I respect your privacy. BUT IM SO CURIOUS. The only clue I have right now is you're male... How much did I use to talk to you or was it a one time deal? I like this mystery. It makes things fun :3. How long have you known me? Do you read my poetry? O.o

My childhood

   They say my biological mom loved me and my siblings. I wouldn't know. I never knew her. They said she wanted to raise us. I wouldn't have thought that. In between the foster homes, abuse, neglect and the broken promises telling us "Mommy's sick" which now I can assume meant mommy was wasted or in the psych ward again.

   But I loved her. I still do with that sick, blind devotion so cruelly hardwired in the human psyche.

   Daddy never existed. I vaguely remember meeting him once but for all I know the tall man had affection for was just another dream my childhood imagination conjured up to soothe the wounds of being last in everyone's list of priorities. I was the "good" kid easy to set aside. Maybe that's why I do so many bad things.

Don't forget me.

   I didn't need to be under watch all the time. My siblings were more then handfuls. They were nuclear bombs one small too-hard nudge and you were done for. I was easy to forget in the flood of their hostility.

I didn't mind the freedom

   The over independence that came with it is a bitch thought. I still don't ask for help even if I really need it, I don't even accept it well.

   When I got adopted everything changed. Eventually "mother" and "father", words that I never knew how to pronounce, evolved into mom and dad and soon to Mama and Papito. 

Dance, Dance

   Once upon a time there was a girl who grew up with being told she was worthless.
                      She believed them.
   She had dreams she never believed in. Hopes she thought were hopeless and love that even if she was brave enough to share, always ended in heartbreak.
   She met a boy, and he was wonderful. But she knew she'd never be worthy of his affection. They went their separate ways.
   Him with his arms around another...
   She never stopped thinking about him...
   She fell in "love" with a phantom. Who bled her dry and disappeared.
                      She was worthless.
   Next came the hunter looking for a pet. With treats and coaxing she was locked away. He was so sweet sometimes but so vicious.
          She was scared.
                       She was trapped.
   Just as quickly as he disappeared the boy reappeared. Except now he had become a man.
   She began to get to know him. Really know him.
                       Silently she worshiped him.
   She watched him from behind her glass wall not knowing he was watching her from behind his own.
   She wanted to be closer to him. To touch his face. She wanted to bask in the sunlight of his smile, if only for a moment.
                      She wanted to be his.
                                            But she didn't deserve it.
   She joked of living together wishing they could, knowing they couldn't.
                      One day he said yes.
   He broke his glass wall and she was afraid.
   Until one day when she fogged up the glass

                                                                  he drew a heart on it.

And it shattered...

   Against all expectations I am in your arms. I'm not scared anymore.

I'm worthy.